I wish there was a word for that feeling… I guess it’s like… a talent crush. The feeling you get when you feel like you could fall in love with someone just based on their work (even though you know it would never really work out). Work being any sort of product of creativity, like writing, or design, or illustration, or printmaking, or painting, or sculpture, or photography, or music, or whatever else people make.
For a while there I don’t think I knew the difference between a talent crush and a regular one. But when I think about it, most of the art kids I’ve ever crushed on were people who just created things that impressed me. I mean, it helps if they’re cute too (although I think most people have grown up to be pretty attractive anyways) but generally few other things are taken into consideration.
There are a few people in my art classes that I’m consistently impressed by. People who don’t have to even say anything yet I almost want to hold hands with just in hopes that I will magicly catch some of their genius. I wish my work spoke for me like that.
I was flipping through Never Eat Alone at work today cause it was just laying around. I was drawn to the bright orange color and the title, which I thought was kinda interesting cause I think a book by me would be titled “Eat Alone Occasionally.”
I tend to think what a lot of people could use is some independence and not NEED other people in order to enjoy themselves. Not to say that relationships (not just the romantic kind) aren’t important, cause I know they what make life interesting and awesome and all that. Maybe it’s just cause it took me so long to figure out how to enjoy myself and be the least bit interesting. At least to myself, for a while it seemed that I found myself to be so boring I couldn’t stand being alone for very long, so I filled my time with temporary people to fill in the gaps in my day. But that’s pretty unfulfilling.
Flipping through the book got me thinking a bit. Even though it’s target audience is obviously a much more business oriented bunch ( it’s sort of a book about networking ) there was some interesting stuff in it. It’s all about building connections through generosity and genuine relationships. And I guess now that I’ve sort of figured myself out, I feel like i’ve hit the point in time where I can turn my attention outward to other people more.
And while there is no way to really be a good designer/artist/whatever through just talking to people, I don’t think there’s any way to be a sucessful one without being able to talk to people either. So as much as I wish my work alone would make people want to fall in love with me, I realize this won’t always/ever be the case.
So… after that 5 paragraph introduction, I suppose I have three main issues right now: learning how to make things that are awesome, learning how to create and maintain connections (at a sort of professional level i guess), and learning how to build and maintain significant relationships with others by helping them. The last two are pretty similar but seperated by the level of closeness I suppose. I’m hoping my Interpersonal Communication class next quarter will help with both.
Geez. That got way too long. I should have been sketching and working on that “making things that are awesome.” But it’s helpful to write all this out. It gets it out of my head and sort of organizes it. And it makes it easier to fall asleep… so.. g’nighty.